It’s different falling in love again in my fifties. The last time I fell in love I was in my twenties and I had a lot of time. I’m not sure I felt this way then, but I don’t remember ever thinking, “Oh my god, I simply don’t have time to go to work, the grocery store (which was rare, honestly), hang out with my friends, exercise and see my boyfriend.”
I’m not in any way implying this is impossible now – or a burden – but it takes a different level of focus and scheduling. I don’t think we’ve ever exchanged a text along the lines of –
“Hey, wanna hang out?”
“Sure.”
Having dinner or coffee – or five minutes at the front door to simply kiss and say, “Hello, I hope you have a good day,” can take a text string of communication that seemingly mimics the coordination of a satellite launch.
Obviously, it’s worth it. We do schedule five minutes at the front door, but we also have long lunches and sometimes late nights when our dogs and children are settled somewhere else, that we’re able to sort what is happening now with work and family and focus on what we want to happen next.
When I saw his home for the first time I asked him, “Who did this?’
“Who did what?”
“Who decorated your place?”
“I don’t know what you mean. I did.”
It was unexpected. As is always the case with seeing someone’s home, it gave me an insight that was unavailable chatting at a gallery or talking across a table. Loads of books, clean lines, warm leather and dark metal showed me he was curious and had a good eye. That he’d found five vintage desk lamps to light his bookcase meant he was either good for the hunt or had incredible luck. The scattering of pictures of his daughters on the refrigerator let me know that he was not all about aesthetics; family first.
When we talk about our future there are lots of things to consider. But I won’t lie and tell you I never look around and think, “How is all of this going to work the Le Lac?”
My book reviews are coming late and short. This is my round up of suggestions from the Fall season.
Dior and His Decorators: Victor Grandpierre, Georges Geffroy and the New Look by Maureen Footer for Vendome Press is simply stunning. If you enjoy design history, this is an absolute don’t miss.
Nina Campbell Elegance and Ease by Gile Kime for Rizzoli New York is a delight. The Art of Decoration was one of my first design books and I still have loads of tear sheets of her work.
Mary Randolph Carter is the very best person to write The Joy of Junk. Remarkably talented, insightful and funny, her approach to junking is pure delight. Lots of good advice on where and how to look. Rizzoli 2018.
Kansas City Houses, 1885-1938 by Michael C. Kathrens for Bauer and Dean Publishers is essential for any KC house lover. Chocked full of history of our neighborhoods, civic leaders and architects with remarkable pictures of the houses when they built and – when possible – today. An absolute treasure.
Wishing you all happiness!
Thank you!
I’m loving that you’re in love. xo
Thanks. Me, too!
This is SO true, so real, so relatable, Patricia!
Thank you!
He has daughters to your sons! And that bit about the garlic! I shall call him Mr. Lucky, and say Cheers to you both! xoxoxo
I am so happy for you! Blessing to both of you. Desk lamps for the bookcase!! Definite compatibility quotient.
Joy, joy, joy! This the Year of the Pig, is bringing you happiness AND wisdom.
One of your most beautiful posts ever, and I don’t mean about the books (though they’re all lovely.) I wanted to hear more about Mr. Lucky! Vulnerable, touching, poignant- wishing you both luck and joy on this journey!
Wonderful post, plus thanks for the reading rec’s……..but as a single gal about to turn 60, where on earth did you meet such a quality gent? It sounds so fun and you two sound like a nice match! Cheers!
We are a great match! It was serendipity. We’d known each other a long time. He became single a few years after I did and the timing was right. You just never know how things are going to work out. Best of luck!
I have loved your blog forever and my heart ached for you when the divorce came. I am so happy that you have found a new love during the time of life of deeper understandings.
Much happiness to you!
Thank you! What a lovely message. Wishing you the best as well!
Yay! That is wonderful.
I am so happy for you.
And, although you are in no way old, here’s a poem that I take to be about love when you’re older.
The Coming of Light
Mark Strand, 1934 – 2014
Even this late it happens:
the coming of love, the coming of light.
You wake and the candles are lit as if by themselves,
stars gather, dreams pour into your pillows,
sending up warm bouquets of air.
Even this late the bones of the body shine
and tomorrow’s dust flares into breath.
Thank you! I love this!
We are in similar states these days, not for the first time. I am so happy for you! Beginning again, wow, heady stuff. Essentials for the journey: shared love of family and home, generous dollops of beauty and fun, sense of humor firmly in place, kindness at the center of it all…
Nancy – so sorry it appeared I didn’t reply. The app on my phone doesn’t seem to be working. Hoping that all is going well for you!